g so, I'll share the events of the evening with you.Now that there is an obvious clean smudge on the wall, to tackle the other bigger smudges, I have to actually get the cloth wet. There is no way I am going to clean the whole wall, it’s 1am for God’s sake, and here I am cleaning the bathroom, how did this happen? So, cautiously using the cloth I carefully smear and smudge the dirty parts of the wall into the clean parts, blending it together as I go. After many years of practice I have perfected the technique, you must have the dampness perfected to prevent a bigger clean mark on your dirty wall. The wall is now smudged all over, so you can’t tell what is dirty and what’s clean anymore. Obviously, I have just made the whole wall dirty again, but it’s not AS dirty as when I started. At this point, I've done just as much work as it would have taken to just clean the damn wall to begin with. But I'm exhausted
At 1am, I wonder how did I end up cleaning the bathroom? Why aren't I sleeping. That's what I should be doing (in a perfect world, but not living in the Brady household, nor is my last name Jetson or Flintstone, due to circumstances beyond my control I am in fact, to my dismay, cleaning the bathroom in the middle of the night.
The following mistake is just as bad, if not worse. While smudging the wall forced to bend over, I was unfortunately made aware of the mess around the bottom of the toilet (especially true when you have teenage boys in your household, although girls are certainly just as guilty as boys). It is too tempting, so I push the stupid little toilet rug that never stays in place anyway, and use it to wipe up the puddle of who knows what with the bright blue rug that doesn’t match anything.
On sa
le for only a $1 at Wal-Mart I purchased that ugly blue rug to use as camouflage. I have never cared for those ridiculous toilet cut-out fuzzy rugs, and really don't understand the rug that goes on top of the toilet seat, that makes the toilet seat fall down (that's a whole other topic) but I had to cover up the cigarette burn marks on the floor. Come on, if you smoke, and you are honest, I know you have smoked the evening’s last cigarette while on the toilet for your last pee for the night. Just sitting down feels so good, so I just sit there and feel the sensation of ahhh, relaxation, sitting there no one is bugging me (they had the good sense to go to bed hours ago. So I sit, and I smoke and I might possibly doze off slightly (understandably) I might drop the cigarette, and wake up because my butt is numb from the toilet seat, and the cigarette left an ugly brown mark on my cheap tile floor. What am I going to tell the landlord, darn, and why don’t I ever learn, it happens a couple times a month, you would think I would stop doing it, for Goodness’s sake? Now, totally exhausted I think to myself, well it’s half clean anyway… before I get out of bed tomorrow the bathroom will be trashed again anyway, so what’s the point. At 2am I am going to get into bed, that is it, this day is over. Lighting my second last cigarette for the night I fall asleep, the cigarette smolders up some paper I told my son not to put in the ashtray. Why should this time be any different, I am tired so I do the dumbest thing you can do, but I do it every time something catches fire in the ashtray, so why should I remember not to BLOW in the ashtray this time, after all it will only spew ashes and burning paper all over my bed? Maybe I should quit smoking just because of the fire damage.
Wide-awake again I remember that when I sat down to write my blog and assignment for the night; was when I originally made the God-awful smudge wiping error. So my brain being mush, not being able to think, much less write anything sensible I say to myself, if I don’t laugh I'm gonna cry, so why not share the experience with some of my closest friends. So please enjoy my new additional blog to my original blog, I believe it will be titled, stupid things I did today!
It's 3am, now, I’m going to sleep…
